The godspunk compilation CD series is a co-operative venture, in which all contributing bands / artistes share the cost of manufacture. Each contributor pays a fraction of the total CD manufacturing cost for each six minutes of audio contributed, gets one page in the accompanying booklet and receives a number of copies of the finished CD album. For volume nine, as an example, six minutes allocation cost £70 and the contributor received 40 copies of the CD. This is an effective way of working, as each band / artiste gets their music on 500 'proper' CDs (not CD-Rs) and has their music heard by the other bands' audiences without the hassle of distribution being the responsibility of one person. If you would like to be considered for inclusion on a future CD, contact Pumf by going to the 'contact' page of this website.

godspunk volume nine

"Sunday August 1st 2010 – I (Luc Tran) went to UNIT HQ for a rehearsal and also to do the regular review of the latest installment in the godspunk franchise (with Andy Martin). I had to wait until the end of the Test Match between England and Pakistan (I still can’t understand what Andy sees in this ridiculous sport) – unfortunately Pakistan lost. To compensate, I discovered that godspunk volume nine is up there with the very best of the collections – it doesn’t quite match the glory of No.5 but it must rank among the top 3.
Howl In The Typewriter: The Edge Of The World
LT –  This is a bit of mess, innit? Nice organ sound tho.
AM – The backing tapes – 
LT – You mean ‘samples’ – get with the century.
AM – As I was saying, the backing tapes are most inventive but the music is too fragmented, the changes lack logic – the result is too much like a sonic jigsaw.
LT – That dance-y bit later on is good tho. The lyrics are totally Rob Simone territory.
AM – You’d best explain that for people who aren’t familiar with him.
LT – Oh yeah, there’s still some people who haven’t heard of Resonance 104.4 FM.
AM – There are still some people, not there is still some people – plural clause.
LT – Oh shut your face. Anyway, Rob Simone presents a programme called Head Room every Monday evening on Resonance 104.4 FM. He’s been doing it since 2004 at least. Check out his website – www.robsimone.org – he interviews all these wild and wacky people like David Icke, Uri Geller and some American pensioner who spent 3 weeks living in an underground city on Venus. He also does shows that are highly critical of American foreign policy, too. Right, advert over. So what d’ya give this then? I reckon 7/10 coz it promises lots but, unusually for HITT, never quite hits the spot.
AM – Yes, 7/10 seems fair enough.
Howl In The Typewriter: Whales
AM – If you’re so concerned about being ‘with the century’ then why don’t you ask Stan to change the name of the group to Howl In The Laptop?
LT – No, it doesn’t have the same romantic ring to it. Famous authors used typewriters – any old cunt can use a laptop.
AM – But I use a laptop.
LT – Exactly. Anyway, this is all a bit wishy-washy, innit? Maybe it needs more analogue keyboards on it rather than –
AM – Oh come on, Luc, get with the century.
LT – Shut up, man, you’re not qualified.
AM – Not qual-
LT – You’ve been listening to Black Sabbath all week. Can you honestly say you’re qualified to give any opinion on anything now?
AM – Well, if you put it like that, no, I suppose not.
LT – So I’ll give this 8/10 – it’s catchy and grows on you.
AM – No, it’s too dreary – 6/10 at the most.
LT – You’re just a sad sap. Go back to your Ozzy Osbourne then.
Howl In The Typewriter: Summer Baby
LT – The vocals are mixed way too low on this – makes the piece sound clumsy and unfinished. That bass guitar sound is groovy tho.
AM – Yes, that’s similar to the sound UJ has adopted for most of our recent material.
LT – This sounds sharper and clearer than our stuff.
AM – Yes, the production on Howl tracks is generally highly professional – but I agree with you about the low volume vocals. This really irritates me, actually, despite the nice bass guitar playing. I’ll give it 4/10.
LT – You keep doing that and he won’t let us be on godspunk volume ten. But I agree, it’s a bit of a platypus this piece – I’ll give it 6/10.
AM – A platypus?
LT – Yeah – sounds as if its made up from bits and pieces that don’t quite mix properly.
Howl In The Typewriter: Ram Raiding
LT – What’s that French punk band from the 1970s that Achoi raved about?
AM – Oh yes, odd little bunch weren’t they? Mind you, so was Achoi. What the devil were they called? Paris Maquis – no, that was their single – Metal Urbain-
LT – That’s it, Metal Urbain – well, don’t you think this sounds like them? Imagine if Stan sung in French instead.
AM – Oh I see what you mean – yes, you’re quite right.
LT – I usually am these days. That’s coz I don’t listen to Black Sabbath.
AM – Look, be fair, I was under direct orders from UJ. There’s no need to be so ineffably otiose.
LT – So in-elephantine what? Oh hold on, the Whales have come back. You know, I can imagine this sung by Liam Gallagher.
AM – Liam Gallagher? You have to be . . . mind you though, now you mention it, yes, I see what you mean – my dear old thing, you really are on sparkling form tonight.
LT – That’s coz I haven’t had my IQ lowered by listening to Black Sabbath CDs. Anyway, what d’ya reckon? I’ll give this 8/10 coz its cool.
AM – No, not for me it isn’t. I’ll give it 5/10.
LT – Ozzy fan.
AM – Ha! That’s rich coming from someone who listens to punk rock.
Dimm D3ciple: The Dream
LT – They’re using my vibraphone! Right, they gain points for that straight away. Wish those vocals were clearer – I really don’t like that weird effect that’s on them. Mind you, when that dance beat comes in and it goes all 1990s on us, that’s really effective – oh bugger it, it’s over.
AM – Yes, it doesn’t hang about, does it? I’ll give it 4/10 and most of that’s for the vibraphone.
LT – No, they deserve more than that – 7/10 at least – it’s a nice, crisp sound and that dance bit in the middle kicks arse.
Dimm D3ciple: Stranded
LT – This is brilliant – punk rock lyric over Brian Eno music – this is really odd. I like it, especially those backward bits.
AM – There’s really no need for the swearing though.
LT – What? This coming from the man who wrote Employment Enjoyment.
AM – No, there was a reason for that – I attacked the gratuitous use of swearing by Channel 4 whereas this-
LT – This is an angry response to parts of our society, there’s a justification for it. Ah, there’s that rave-y type beat again – oh, it’s stopped now, just when I was enjoying it, too.
AM – Well, this doesn’t do it for me at all, musically anyway. The lyric is the best aspect of it. I’ll award it 3/10.
LT – Christ, you’ve really lost the plot. There, the beat’s returned and it grooves along nicely. It deserves 8/10 at least.
The Balkan'oliks: Tree Peva Kozol
LT – The bass guitar and the percussion are crisp and punchy – plus that’s a mighty fine strong vocal, too – this lot were good on the last godspunk as well, weren’t they?
AM – I think so but, to be honest, this piece suffers from being in the same bloody key all the way through. It needs more harmonic variety. The chap has a fine set of lungs though and the mix between vocals and instruments is excellent. I’ll give it 5/10.
LT – Only 5/10? No, it deserves more than that – I know the music’s a bit repetitive but it’s only 2 and a half minutes. No, I like this enough to give it 7/10.
The Balkan'oliks: Dicky Dicky Dick Boom
LT – Do you know, this sounds like – well, it has the same kinda feel as those reggae tracks Resonance plays every Wednesday night. Can you imagine this as a dub reggae thing?
AM – Yes, I see what you mean; it does possess that atmosphere. I tell you what, these people can certainly play – I mean, it’s rather simple but the music is crisp, clear and punchy as you said earlier. It’s a strong production but the music isn’t going anywhere is it?
LT – Well, where d’ya want it to go – Manchester?
AM – Oh come on, my little piranha fish, be reasonable. I mean, I’m waiting for something to happen but it never does. 4/10.
LT – But with that fiddle and everything, it makes the piece more interesting. No, it deserves more than that – 6/10 at least. I reckon this bunch could put together a really interesting album – maybe with a few more chords and different instruments used tho.
Lenin’s Virulent Muscle: Turf The Roads
LT – This is excellent! UJ would love this lyric. It’s really funny if you picture Vladimir Lenin singing it, too.
AM – Yes, full marks for the words . . . pity about the music. I’ll give it 4/10.
LT – But the music sort of growls quietly along in a controlled rage, it’s really effective, especially with the contrast between the high female and low male voices. This warrants 8/10.
Lenin’s Virulent Muscle: Spider Crabs
LT – Ooer – this is a bit drippy, innit?
AM – Acoustic guitar valium rock – it’s dreadful.
LT – Oh come on, be fair – the words are good and the playing’s nice and clear. At least he or she can play that acoustic guitar well.
AM – It’s still dreary to the point of being morbid – it’s horrible.
LT – Bah! May all your pies be filled with quorn for ever more!
AM – Fair enough – I’m a vegetarian anyway, have been since 1983.
LT – Really? I didn’t know that.
AM – You didn’t know I was a veg . . . how long have you known me? Since 2002, wasn’t it? 
LT – Well, what about the track then?
AM – Well it is, it’s horrible. I can’t stand this kind of stuff. 2/10 and that’s for the lyric.
LT – They don’t deserve to be dismissed so easily. Mind you, the music is a bit much after a while. I’ll give it 5/10.
The Death Of The Enlightenment Project: Iblis
LT – So what’s going on here then? Ansaphone message . . . someone eating crisps down a telephone line . . . oh shit, it’s one of those tracks, all grim and grisly noises – bloody hell, the speakers are rattling.
AM – Quite right too – if our speakers are to be destroyed then let them be destroyed by something exciting, something vibrant, something that kicks serious arse – so far this is the most impressive track yet.
LT – What? You have to be joking. It’s just a repetitive noise.
AM – Just a . . ? Look, this is the first really impressive track I’ve heard so far – it’s the first piece to display any passion or originality.
LT – That’s being really unfair to Dimm, Lenin, The Balkan'oliks and-
AM – I’m simply being honest. I know The Balkan'oliks have a distinct sound of their own, granted, but their tracks tend to sound similar, to my ears anyway, whereas this piece-
LT – . . . is a repetitive noise. 
AM – Jesus Christ in a tutu.
LT – Well it is, listen to it.
AM – There! They heard you – it’s suddenly changed, cut to a slaughterhouse – now we’re in Jacques Cousteau territory – camera pan to a 1920s salon!
LT – Idiot – that’s the next track. That’s what happens when you listen to a racket that deserves 1/10 and that’s just for the ansaphone message – you’re brain’s gone for a burton.
AM – My God, that’s an old phrase – I’ve not heard that for years!
LT – That’s probably coz this horrible noise is sending me back to the womb.
AM – I wonder what the derivation is of that term, ‘gone for a burton’ – it’s most odd.
LT – So was that bloody racket.
AM – Oh you’re a hard bastard at times – I’m giving it 8/10 at the very least, it’s menacing and merely needs a little more variety in the central section to merit full marks.
John Tree: The W*y You Look Ton*ght
LT – What the bloody hell is this all about then?
AM – No idea – Resonance would love this – bits and pieces – that bloody Eric Satie again.
LT – Eric Satie?
AM – Yes, hear that dreadful piano? It’s his most famous piece. Satie is the most stupid, tedious and boring composer France ever produced. The 1920s gear sounds positively ecstatic by comparison. I wonder if this is an original 1920s piece modified by 21st century computer technology or a contemporary person doing a pastiche or a homage to that era?
LT – I dunno but it’s really irritating. 2/10.
AM – You think so? Well, it is a bit ponderous but it’s also rather unusual – I’ll give it 5/10.
Boxhead: Static & Silence
LT – What’s this in – 6/4 isn’t it?
AM – Probably. Jesus, why does this have to be so repetitive? It’s a shame because this is a really nice, cool groove – it needs a vibraphone or a saxophone playing a lead melody or improvising over the top.
LT – Yeah, I agree, it sounds like a backing track to something. The drums are too loud, as well.
AM – Yes I think so, too. There, they heard us – it’s changed now.
LT – It’s still in that same key tho – I wish it’d do something different – it’s started to annoy me now.
AM – The electric piano does that to most people – I do like it even though it is a bit 1970s.
LT – Yeah, that’s what it is – film music– 
AM – Absolutely! Imagine this played in the background as an angst ridden young detective in side-burns and flares searches for the missing body somewhere in the backstreets of Paris. I’ll give it 7/10.
LT – No, I can’t be that generous – 6/10.
Seven Footsteps To Satan: The Devil’s Janitor
LT – Oh yeah! All right – this is more like it. Yeah, this is the best one yet.
AM – Bedroom rave – the Chemical Brothers without the technology – but I agree with you, it is rather gear. It merits 8/10.
LT – Yeah, it has energy, a wonderful Hammer horror laugh in the middle and – what? Is that it? It’s over already? Right, well, I deduct 2 points because it’s far too short – I was really enjoying that, too. 8/10.
The Shi-ites: Dopamine Dream
LT – More acoustic guitars-
AM – Yes, acoustic guitar valium rock again – bah, this is miserable, dreary-
LT – Shut up, man, you don’t know nothing about anything. There’s a nice folky type of thing going on here.
AM – It’s perfectly horrid.
LT – That coming from the man who owns every recording Gentle Giant ever made.
AM – Your point being?
LT – Well, it proves your opinion on anything musical simply can’t be trusted at all . . . not at all.
AM – What, so you’d like to hear this again, would you?
LT – Yeah, I wouldn’t mind – it’s all right, I mean it’s nothing special but it’s a bloody sight better than that Iblis racket you raved about.
AM – I don’t care – I give it 0/10 because it’s the most irritating track I’ve heard so far and also because I know they’re capable of much better material – they recorded some far superior tracks on previous godspunks.
LT – You better hope they’re not real Shi-ites or you’ll go to work and find your office has been blown up. No, they should have 4/10 at least.
AM – See? Even after all that ingratiating waffle, you only give them 4/10.
LT – Oh shut up, man, you’re just a pussy. Worse, you’re a pussy who likes prog rock. Worse still, you’re a pussy who not only likes prog rock but you don’t even have the decency to be ashamed of it.
The Melodramatic Monkey: Giraffe & Egg
LT – Hello, it’s Stan again. Not content with sneaking onto one of our tracks, he’s crept into this one as well. He has a very distinctive voice, doesn’t he?
AM – Yes . . .
LT – Why’re ya chuckling?
AM – Because he always sounds so spiteful and feisty – always sounds as if he’s ready to insult someone – it’s a most endearing characteristic.
LT – Here, listen to this – it’s gone into a rolling juggernaut groove. This is pretty bloody good.
AM – Yes it is – an excellent bass guitar or bass keyboard sound – and there’s a xylophone!
LT – A reggae groove’s crept in now – this is brilliant!
AM – Luc, I think we’ve discovered the best track on here!
LT – Yeah, there always seems to be one, doesn’t there? I mean, one track on these compilations that’s obviously and clearly superior to all the others.
AM – Yes . . . pity it’s never one of our own works.
LT – But that’s different – we can’t judge that, can we? We’re too close to our own stuff to be able to offer a proper comment on it.
AM – No, it’s the curse of the creative artist ever to be denied the luxury of objectivity.
LT – Fair enough, I couldn’t put it better myself.
AM – No you couldn’t, because you never read books and you always have that damned I-pod stuffed in your ear like so much plastic spaghetti-
LT – Oh shut up, man, and get back to your Gentle Giant records. Anyway, I’m giving this 10/10. What d’ya reckon?
AM – Yes, certainly 9/10 – I think I’d prefer it to last a little longer.
Lazlo Klemke: The Spyral Suitcase
LT – Now, is this really some undiscovered soundtrack from the 1960s or is it Dan Whaley pretending? I reckon it’s him pretending.
AM – Why?
LT – Coz the music’s all too well produced – the bass guitar is deep, punchy and clear. The only 1960s recordings where bass guitars ever sound like that are those on Japanese pop ‘groups sounds’ records. No, this is all too clear and precise – it even sounds digital. This is someone doing a very clever recreation of 1960s spy thriller soundtracks.
AM – Well, you can always check on the net – type Lazlo Klemke into Google.
LT – Okay then, when I go home I will – of course, if you weren’t such a bloody retro-head luddite, you’d be on the internet here and we could check it out and give a more intelligent review of the piece.
AM – It has nothing to do with my hostility toward technology – I simply don’t want the authorities and the advertisers to know where to find me. I intend to remain below the radar for as long as possible.
LT – Oh well, yeah, that’s fair enough; I can understand that.
AM – Anyway, here we are again with that French detective still searching for the body-
LT – No, he’s found it from the sound of this.
AM – Good – now maybe he’ll bugger off and make his racket somewhere else.
LT – You what? D’ya mean to tell me, in all seriousness, that you don’t like this?
AM – No I don’t – I mean to say, hang it all, this kind of stuff has been done and dusted decades ago and it really wasn’t any good at the time so it’s hopelessly out of step with the contemporary scene now. It’s not relevant to what’s happening now.
LT – But does that matter? Is Bach relevant to what’s happening now?
AM – No, you can hardly make that comparison because Bach serves an entirely different function. It’s music designed-
LT – But it’s still ancient music – it might be really good, I dunno, I find Bach and all that baroque and 18th century stuff boring but if a piece of music was really good in 1966 then isn’t it just as good now? Besides, you could say UNIT is retro – if we were that 21st century then we’d be doing slow jams, R&B and grime.
AM – Oh yes, certainly, but you see I don’t believe most 1960s film music was anywhere near as exciting or dramatic as modern listeners would have us believe. Look at all those trendy Camden types who rave about The Kinks, The Small Faces and 1960s pop groups – most of it is utter drivel. What they’re doing is trying to resurrect what they perceive to be a magical era because they’re too young to have lived during it. Well, I was born in 1966 and my only abiding memory of that period is intense bigotry, ridiculous attitudes and desperate poverty. The sixties were only swinging and fab if you were one of the elite minority of trendy young things whose parents were sufficiently wealthy and indulgent to support your decadent lifestyle. If you were an ethnic minority in Britain, the 1960s were definitely not swinging, fab and groovy.
LT – Well, I can’t say much about that, can I? I was born in 1989.
AM – Good – that means you missed the 1980s, the decade that decency forget – crap fashions, crap politics and crap music. This is irritating as well. 3/10.
LT – Oh come on, it deserves far more than that. I’ll give it 7/10. Actually, if it really is an original 1960s soundtrack then it deserves 7/10 but if its people recreating that sound in the 21st century then it merits 8/10 for being so clever.
the taurus board: the hod cloppers: the first rehearsal
LT – Here we go – you can nearly always rely on Hef to deliver the goods.
AM – Yes, usually it’s worth saving the taurus board until last because his tracks generally form the one contribution to any godspunk album on which we agree.
LT – Pity about that voice toward the end tho.
AM – Really? I rather enjoy that about his pieces, those strange, daft people nattering on about this and that.
LT – But they interfere with the music – like when you try to listen to a programme on an FM radio and some other foreign station starts to butt in – that’s what it’s like. I wanna hear this without that voice.
AM – That’s a fair point actually. It’s a kicking groove though.
LT – Yeah, it’s one of his stronger efforts. Let’s play it again.
AM – Fair enough. Do you realise that when people read these reviews, we come across as real taurus board fans? ‘Oh, it’s those lads from UNIT again – well, I suppose they’ll do what they always do, save the taurus board till last and rave about it as usual.’
LT – Tough! We can’t help it if his stuff is always so good.
AM – UJ doesn’t like the taurus board much.
LT – UJ likes Metallica so his opinion is absolutely worthless. Christ, he’s even more far gone than you are.
AM – Oh, thank you very much. So does that mean you accept my love of Ornette Coleman, The Sun Ra Arkestra and Peter Brötzmann?
LT – Oh shit, yeah, I forgot about all that crap – no, I take it back – no-one’s as far gone as you are. Anyway, I’m giving this only 9/10 because of that silly voice at the end.
AM – Fair enough – but I’ll award it 10/10 despite the silly voice!
UNIT: Employment Enjoyment
LT – You know this could be a really good pop song with an excellent lyric but you had to go and spoil it with all that silly saxophone squealing in the middle.
AM – But Luc, I put that in to make the piece more adventurous and less like a normal, conventional pop song.
LT – No, you’ve already achieved that with the lyric and the splendid harmonic progression you asked me to write for the keyboards. It sounds like a bit of one of your avant garde jazz records has gate-crashed itself into our pop song.
AM – Well, yes, I see what you mean. You know, what really annoys me about this?
LT – Your vocals.
AM – Yes! How did you know?
LT – Because you always complain about your vocals – honestly, they aren’t nearly as awful as you think they are. Okay, you don’t have a very powerful voice but at least you can sing in time and in tune.
AM – I still sing like a strangled parrot.
LT – Anyway, I like this version because I prefer pStan’s voice to Richard’s in the spoken bits. I’ll only give it 7/10 because that saxophone and piano string scratching in the middle spoils it.
AM – Well, I’ll give it 8/10 because those aspects improve it!
UNIT: Minh, Binh & Vinh
LT – God, this is boring. I much prefer the version on Sons Of The Dragon.
AM – What’s the matter with this one then?
LT – It’s too much like heavy metal and it’s repetitive, all that daft twiddly lead guitar. I’m glad UJ wanted the Hammond B3 to be used, tho, that makes a big difference.
AM – Yes, your playing has definitely improved over the years – not that it was ever bad.
LT – No but sometimes I went out of time – my time-keeping was dreadful when I first joined the group. This rocks along nicely but it needs something more to make it interesting and less like some 1970s rock thing. I’ll give it 5/10 and even then I’m being generous.
AM – Well, I quite like it, especially since I’m not on it, so I’ll give it 7/10.
UNIT: Labor Callum Obducit Dolori
LT – Here we go again – this could be a really catchy instrumental like Ming Hai but Richard has to put in a bloody drum solo and it’s not even that well played.
AM – You really are dicing with death here, Luc.
LT – No, seriously, if you’re going to shove in a drum solo then you have to be able to use the drums in an interesting and inventive manner – he just bashes away like a maniac.
AM – Quietly bonkers is what you wrote.
LT – Well, I was being polite because he was in the room at the time.
AM – Who’s that on the vibraslap?
LT – That’s Richard as well. He had 5 bloody cymbals and 2 floor toms but it just sounds messy. The aeroplanes are good, tho!
AM – My favourite is your additional melody on that Casio VL Tone when the main music returns after Richard has done his Ginger Baker bit. I missed most of this when you 3 did it.
LT – Well you were reading that crazy book by Frank Key. I’ve never understood what you see in that stuff.
AM – Have you never heard his programme Hooting Yard on Resonace?
LT – A coupla times, yeah, but it’s too silly, I can’t get into it at all. I can get into this, tho. Yeah, I’m actually enjoying this now. Maybe the drum solo isn’t so bad after all. I’ll give it 7/10.
AM – This is the first time I’ve really listened to this since it was first mixed – yes, it really is one of our better tracks – 8/10.
UNIT: Eagle
LT – I’m glad we included this version of this track. It really is one of the best things you’ve ever written. That said, I still prefer the version with your singing.
AM – Really? My dear old thing – but UJ has a mournful, restrained character that really suits this piece. It also means that out of the 4 pieces on this album, I’m only on 1 of them!
LT – Yeah, he sings really clearly, I’ll give him that – you can hear all the words – I really enjoyed playing this – all those unconventional chord progressions. Who is McKenna anyway?
AM – He doesn’t really exist – well, no, he does exist but he’s actually an amalgam of 3 different people I’ve known over the years. The name derives from Joseph McKenna, a young Glaswegian actor who appeared in Coronation Street, the play The Slab Boys by Johnny Byrne and the episode A Little Learning by Ian McCulloch from the 1970s science fiction series Survivors. It was that latter appearance that inspired the piece – he plays Eagle, the leader of a group of children forced to fend for themselves in a post-apocalyptic society, Britain after its population has been decimated by a global plague.
LT – Well, I’m glad you watched it then since this ballad was the result. Is that the same series UJ has been watching for weeks?
AM – Yes – I showed him a couple of episodes in 2009 and he was so inspired he asked me to buy him the complete box set of all 3 series. In fact, I only vaguely remember it from when I was a boy but Andy Nunn sent me the first few episodes in 2008 and I was so amazed and impressed that I ordered the original box set of DVDs from e-bay.
LT – Well anyway, I’m giving this 10/10 because now I’ve removed that horrible saxophone and flute section, it’s perfect.
AM – Indeed? I’ll give it only 9/10 because now you’ve surgically removed the saxophone and flute section it isn’t quite so impressive or interesting! Mind you, it does work as a more conventional ballad like this and you’ve done the remix really well.

LT – Okay then – so how does godspunk volume nine compare with all the others?
AM – Well, I still haven’t heard a collection that matches the almost continual excellence of godspunk volume five but there are a few fine moments on this set.
LT – I reckon it’s one of the best yet. Congratulations and respect due to Stan & Co!"
- Luc Tran & Andy Martin, in a personal e-mail to pStan Batcow, 1st August 2010.

godspunk volume eight

"Evil Jack McDeath: The Sunglassed Eye - Far too long and repetitive - definitely 1981 cassette bedroom feel to this. 5/10.
DIMM: Ixx Perra Mental - Dear God but this is bloody irritating and there are 6 minutes of it, too. I definitely prefer the tracks on the previous CD because this is intolerable. However, one thing is obvious: this has the most professional sound of all the tracks here and since it is evident that plenty of work and thought went into it, I have to award it at least 6/10.
The Shi-ites: Spatial - Bloody hell, it’s Oasis . . . oh no, my mistake, it’s actually The Sh-iites. OK, so where’s the hammond organ then? Sorry lads, but this is horrible. The vocals are too quiet as well. 3/10.
Heffalump Trap: Bus Shelter - Over 6 minutes of this - hey oop - for that amount of time I want progressive rock, free jazz or decent heavy metal - but this is none of those. Christ it’s repetitive. DO SOMETHING! Change that bloody riff, go somewhere interesting, yes yes yes, you’ve done that same thing for 3 solid minutes now do something else . . . no? Oh. Are you sure you won’t go to another key, a different sonic background or a different time signature? No? Oh. Well, sorry, but you leave me no alternative. I did warn you. 2/10.
The Cockfield Two: On The Hook - The booklet image and text are excellent - but the music is, er, less so. Keyboard too loud, vocals too quiet & I absolutely loathe drum machines (as Stan now knows, having read my review of The Def-A-Kators CD). 3/10.
Boxhead: Sebok Goes To The Shops - This is what those baggy trousered I-pod bedecked Chavs deserve to have done to them! 8/10.
Boxhead: Murderer - More Resonance material; they’d love this. Highly amusing but way too long. 7/10.
The Melodramatic Monkey: Eaten By A Giant Razz - Related to Boxhead perchance? This is from a similar stable. A bit too silly even for me but it could start a new genre: avant garde hip hop. 6/10.
The Melodramatic Monkey: Ragzilla Vs Octopus - The various bizarre sections prevent this from being a ‘skip forward’ job but it’s still bloody tedious after a while. There are interesting moments where it is by turns intriguing and amusing but it still only rates 5/10.
The Melodramatic Monkey: Nipples - This is better, more effective and unpredictable. All 3 of these should be sent to Resonance as I’m sure they’d be played on air. Certainly they deserve to be heard by a broader audience - and no, I don’t just mean fat people. There is something delightfully unpretentious about these 3 pieces as if they are saying ‘it’s okay to have fun with technology’. 7/10.
The Balkan'oliks: Sabaka Casa - More fun with technology but inna gypsy east European stylee. Romany folk songs versus drum ‘n’ bass and why not? A bit tedious after a while but still enjoyable. 6/10.
The Balkan'oliks: Syrnyj Poezd - Christ knows how you pronounce that. Again, it’s too repetitive for my ears but still interesting and highly unusual. 7/10.
Howl In The Typewriter: Rainbow Footsteps - Typically nasty lyric backed by mutated pop music; it all sounds unusually murky and muddy but there’s a nice guitar sound. 6/10.
Howl In The Typewriter: (The Very Long Title) - Bloody hell, I’m not typing all that out. It’s a superb sentiment anyway. Actually, the cosmos is mainly just empty space where nothing happens at all. I think it was designed by Samuel Beckett. Turn up the vocals, for crying out loud, so we can all hear them, what are you playing at down there? Superb end quote. 4/10.
Howl In The Typewriter: Seven Men - Highly disturbing taped voice set to totally inappropriate and extremely irritating music so the whole effect is ruined. You’re a cruel man, Stan. 3/10.
Howl In The Typewriter: The Circuit - Harp glissandi (The Beach Boys come to mind) plus sampled church bells that are totally in tune with the music - blimey, Stan Batcow joins New Order. This is absolutely brilliant, mutant pop at its best. Superb. One of the very best tracks Howl In The Typewriter have ever recorded; should be on Radio 1 and X FM on a daily basis. 10/10.
Howl In The Typewriter: Beach Bum - Ah, I mentioned the Beach Boys just now and look what happens. I have a CD on which I have collected all my favourite Beach Boys tracks...so I suppose you don’t want a copy, do you, Stan? No, I thought not. 7/10.
UNIT: One Of The Lads - Can yellow men play the blues? Based on this excursion, apparently not. Why did they ask me to resurrect this ancient Apostles number? It’s ridiculous. My singing is even worse. 2/10.
UNIT: Shameless - I try to be Karl Blake and fail but UJ enjoys himself on guitars and Luc drags his Casio VL Tone all the way from 1983. So that little instrument was manufactured 6 years before he was born. Some of my sax notes are actually in tune - sell out! 7/10.
UNIT: Buckingham Palace Burns Down - The bass guitar is too quiet. Probably the best drumming Luc has ever done for UNIT so far. UJ excels himself on guitar - or knackers himself trying - ee but it’s reet champion all the same. 9/10.
UNIT: Mr Arsehole - Lovely chord sequence by Luc and excellent bass guitar by UJ with his sarcastic vocals that just emphasise what a crap voice I have by comparison. The drumming is only just in time though! 8/10.
UNIT: I Heard Him Call My Name - They insisted we record this and what a waste of time it was, too. The original song is crap and the recording and performance is a mess. Backing vocals too loud, Luc on drums is too quiet. Despite some frantic guitar from UJ, this is still dire. 1/10.
the taurus board: In Der Teestube - The first 2’35” constitute the most boring, tediously repetitive nonsense I’ve ever heard; it’s absolutely abysmal. I’d never have thought it possible from the taurus board. Then at 2’36”, normal service is resumed and we have a kick ass groove straight from the Ministry Of Sound. The first half: 0/10. The second half: 9/10.
Summary: more humour and fun filled frolics on this issue but it requires a few more conventional pop or rock songs plus one or two more ‘traditional avant garde’ pieces (a la Hebetation or Stream Angel) for an ideal balance of genres. Major discovery this time around: The Balkan'oliks - make sure they’re on godspunk 9 please!"
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, Nov 2oo9)

godspunk volume seven

"Myself and Luc Tran listened to this CD in the order in which these tracks are reviewed here. Most tracks we played twice before committing ourselves to any opinions. In general, I favour avant garde and experimental soundscapes whereas Luc is more interested in rock and pop pieces. In this manner, perhaps the resultant review will be more balanced and indicative of the contents – or perhaps our views will still be a load of bollocks. You decide.
SAASSS: La La La (6/10)  - Horrible song title, dreadful name – but this field recording of a primary school music session is strangely attractive – taken out of context by appearing on this compilation, the music has a slightly plangent quality. Luc gives this 1/10 – he says its boring – I told you he was a sap.
Ray Reagan And The RayGuns: Dopamine (4/10) - This grunge infected pop song veers too close to punk rock for my tastes – the quiet section works best – the vocalist has precise diction so the disturbing words can be heard clearly as they’re spat out over the distorted guitar noise – Luc gives this 8/10 but then he would.
HRT: The Hairline Crack (5/10) - If Five Or Six were alive and active today, they might just record music like this – guitars like humpback whales – drenched in reverb and digital delay – my one complaint is that this is far too long for its content – after about 3 minutes I become bored with it. Luc, being perhaps more patient, awards this 7/10.
Arkon Daraul: The Dogs / Fording Principle (9/10) - This is the kind of sonic weirdness Cherry Red used to release circa 1981 – so it should sound old fashioned and dated – but it doesn’t! Why? I don’t know yet – perhaps it doesn’t matter – this works because it creates an interesting and slightly disturbing atmosphere (and boasts an intriguing title, too). Luc also gives this 9/10 because he’s a genius.
Las Vegas Mermaids: Bruce Willis (9/10) - In our brief experience, this outfit are generally much more satisfying in live concerts than in their studio recorded work. However, they have a hit here: they’ve managed to create a wonderfully spiteful assault on Hollywood action heroes set to a pastiche of 1980s synthi-pop that positively oozes sarcasm with its combination of satirical text and smooth, sexy female vocal delivery. Luc goes further and awards this 10/10 so this is definitely the hit single from the compilation.
Dimm D3ciple: Take A Day (1/10) - So come on chaps, just how do you pronounce ‘D3ciple’? Christ, I can’t stand this, it really irritates me! Luc gives it 7/10 because, unlike me, he isn’t allergic to acoustic guitars. He reckons this would sound even better if there’d been a vocal harmony going with 2 singers.
Dimm D3ciple: Smoke Screen (2/10) - Bloody hell, what an excellent introduction – then it goes tits up and enters Mike Oldfield territory – bah! Luc, who says this would be excellent if that ‘noise’ at the start was removed, still gives it 8/10.
The Cheeky Buddhas: Water Wings (7/10) - This is from very similar territory to La La La – manipulated field recordings – but that insistent marimba rhythm becomes irritating after a while. On the other hand . . . I can’t make my mind up about this. As more instruments are added, it becomes more interesting – an African sound – then the clarinet enters and I’m hooked! Even Luc is prepared to give this the benefit of the doubt with a generous 8/10.
Maybe Alaska: Sound Effects (6/10) - Is that Little Walter on amplified harmonica? Is that Brian Eno on synthesiser? Is this ‘a tedious self indulgent seven minute sonic mess’ (Luc) or ‘an intriguing exploration of distortion on disparate juxtaposed musical genres’ (me)? The 5/4 rhythm that kicks in around 6’ heralds the section that convinces me: ‘if you don’t stop (garbled) down the stairs while I’m recording, I’ll f****** explode’! Luc shamelessly awards this a mere 1/10.
Richard: My Life As A Supermodel (1/10) - Christ, is this a mess or what? It’s horrible! Sounds like the singer’s stood next to me while the band is in the basement. Luc likes the lyric so he gives it 4/10.
Upwey-hey: Clare’s Noodle (1/10) What on earth is this all about then? Luc mutters ‘too silly’ but still gives it 3/10.
John Tree: The Fetishist (8/10) - My God, this is so cool it’s straight out of the fridge. It needs a saxophone instead of that irritating banjo, though. The keyboard lends an aura of menace. The pizzicato string section is effective. The title really suits this mood music. Now look at Luc, he’s given it 4/10, says it goes on too long, what a pussy.
Chelsea From Essex: Deal Ear (1/10) - This hurts my ears – if Whitehouse wrote pop tunes, they’d sound like this. I don’t mind telling you this is driving me quietly bonkers. Mind you, it’s obvious a fair amount of thought and effort has gone into this. Luc says it makes him laugh – maybe it’s driven him psychotic? He gives it 2/10.
RooHmania: Thoughtless A (4/10) - Vangelis meets Tangerine Dream, God help us. Luc gives this 2/10 – well, really!
RooHmania: Thoughtless B (6/10) - Vangelis meets The Tomorrow People – this is a definite improvement – an apparently gentle new age electronic wallpaper piece but there’s an unhealthy threat of violence in the background. Luc gives this 2/10 as well – there’s no pleasing some people.
RooHmania: Thoughtless C (7/10) - Vangelis meets Tangerine Dream in the Tomorrow People laboratory – probably the best of the three – but these are at their most effective when the trio are joined together to make a continuous work. Luc gives this 6/10.
The Richwoods: Snow On The Sea, Uke Crazy Mother, Chinned (6/10) - All 3 of these otherwise delightful ukelele pieces are seriously spoiled by the O.T.T. reverb that has been plastered over them – the final piece works best, perhaps because the effects actually become part of the music – but it sounds unfinished – still, it makes a change from the electric guitars and cheesy keyboards favoured by most other groups. Luc gives this 4/10 which is bit cruel, surely?
Howl in the Typewriter: Planet Head (8/10) - It hovered between 7/10 and 8/10 – then the bagpipes kicked in – that did it! Luc only gives this 6/10 because he’s a sap.
Howl in the Typewriter: Dandelion (3/10) - Sorry, Stan, but this falls way below your normal standard – we wait for something to happen but it never does. Even Luc, who normally enjoys HITT, can only go as far as 4/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Garden Of Eden (7/10) - Nice use of choir sample and drum track in related rhythm – closely recorded spoken vocal is oddly disturbing – on second hearing this is really rather good – especially the sentiment spoken clearly at the end with which we both agree totally. For that reason alone it deserves the 8/10 Luc awards it.
the taurus board: Starfish (8/10) - The best aspect of godspunk CDs is that there is always a taurus board track. This is the one outfit that both Luc and I agree on, i.e. we reckon they’re bloody brilliant and that anyone who disagrees with us is simply wrong. I was a raver in the 1990s so I have an excuse – Luc missed it all (he was born in 1989) so with him there’s no possible accusation of nostalgia kicking in. However, this (like all their contributions so far) is not retro – it’s rave music for the 21st century. Once again, Luc starts jiving and dancing and I have to stand up and join in. That’s the effect this outfit has on cool, groovy people. As a piece of music to hear through speakers in my home, it loses some of its effectiveness, being rather repetitive: in a club with the right vibe this would be a kicking tune! Luc awards it 9/10.
Finally, it’s over to Luc for our own group.
UNIT: Scoop Six Place Pot (6/10) - I wrote this to give UJ a hard time on bass guitar. I find punk rock really funny – it’s silly but enjoyable. The drum sound is crap, mainly because I can’t really play drums, I just fake it. The title is by Birmingham poet Andy Nunn and is something to do with betting on horse racing. I enjoyed this at the time but hearing it now, it’s a bit moronic. Andy gives it 3/10.
UNIT: Better Dead Than Red (7/10) - The music to ‘F*** Off Gordon Brown’ is used for a new lyric by Andy which I think is a bit worrying because it veers too close to the BNP manifesto for my liking. This music is brilliant, one of his best pop tunes, but those words make me cringe. Andy gives it 9/10 because he’s a right wing nutter.
UNIT: Michael’s Brothel (6/10) - The title is by UJ – we’ve been trying to persuade Michael to join UNIT for nearly 2 years – he’s a better keyboard player than I’ll ever be – and he rattled this off in one take then asked me to add electronic keyboards and a bass guitar part. UJ does okay on bass but I’m not sure this actually needs the vibes – the time keeping is a bit suspect in places too. Andy gives it 7/10.
UNIT: Eagle (10/10) - This is easily one of the very best pop songs Andy has ever written – it’s bare hard – excellent words and strange, haunting music – I like the interesting harmonies, the Wire guitar and the vocals by UJ – a version of this without the guitar and with Andy singing instead of UJ is on our latest album ‘Class War' but both Andy and I prefer this version. UJ insisted what he considered the ‘better’ version (with Andy singing) be included on the album – well, he was wrong – this is the definitive one! Andy only gives it 8/10 because he reckons the central saxophone section spoils it.
In conclusion: far more purely instrumental works on this compilation than previously – which makes a pleasant change – but this needs a couple more out and out pop or rock pieces for variety. On the whole this is still one of the best godspunks yet."
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow)

godspunk volume six

"Howl in the Typewriter: Weigh How - It is due to tracks like this that I much prefer Howl in the Typewriter to the Ceramic Hobs. There is a slightly 1980s synthipop aspect to this is highly effective, not unlike Exhibit A or Twelve Cubic Feet. Luc says it oozes with suggestions of menace but I reckon he’s just quoting a review by someone else of a different piece entirely. 8/10.
Evil Jack McDeath: Interference - A bizarre instrumental that threatens to break into something interesting but never quite manages it. If it was a little longer perhaps I’d prefer it more. Still, it’s worth 7/10.
Jaw-D: Let 'Em Dance - Boring monotonous tedium recorded in a biscuit tin – which is probably rather a cruel thing to say but then it’s rather a cruel number. I did enjoy the occasional electronic noises that shoot across the piece. 2/10.
The Style Pigs: Fountain Of Blood - This is another of those songs that irritate me because it uses one of those old cliché chord progressions – although the brazenly vitriolic words do provide a highly bizarre contrast. 5/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Shit Bomb - Well, this is related to the previous number really – less than interesting music plastered with raucous invective that is too violently cynical even for me to be in total agreement with it but by ‘eck, what a mushroom cloud laying lyric! 6/10. NOTE: So it’s a crying shame that, after trying 11 different copies of the CD at random, this 1 track will not play properly all the way through on any of them – this is hardly deliberate since the skips and crackles are not identical on each of them but similar, i.e. they appear at around about the same time and continue, off and on, throughout most of the song. NOTE: Oh all right, so it IS deliberate you awkward sod.
John Tree: Fen Rap - A ‘nothing’ number – I had to play it a second time because the first time it made so little impression on me. No, sorry but it’s no better the second time around either. 2/10.
Turn Leathers: Rock & Pop Volume 1 \ The Rise & Fall Of Western Capitalism - This starts in Henry Cow mode then comes on like a northern answer to Derek & Clive – although the music is far more interesting! The first time I played this it irritated me but parts of it amused me so I played it again and it improves on second hearing – a kind of avant garde approach to humour while still, possibly, making a serious point – or maybe not. Who cares? It’s stuff like this that reminds me how incredibly pompous I can be at times. We need tracks like this to remind us we’re still just animals with I-pods and a neat line in designer sportswear. 8/10.
The Shi-ites: Swirlygig - Nice bass guitar sound – nice guitar sound – nice keyboard sound – pity about the music. (Ooh we are in a crabby mood this evening, aren’t we?) Sorry lads, I want to like this but there’s something missing from what should be a groovy instrumental. It’s vaguely 154-period Wire in sound – that’s certainly a compliment from me. I like the way this submerges itself underwater towards the end. 6/10. Now we’ve just gone back and played this again – yes, on second listen it merits 7/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Iodine Twat - Oh it’s these miserable bastards again. Backwards doesn’t cut it, folks – it still sounds like an unfinished backing track. 3/10.
Bartles: The Psychiatrists Head - Thank Christ this bunch returned for another stab at godspunk – their previous 2 contributions were superb so I was prepared to be disappointed this time around – but no, this also makes the grade albeit in a very different (cool jazz) musical mode. The kind of incisive lyric we’ve come to expect from this lot with that ever reliable combination: fury and humour. It rarely fails. 8/10.
Elwyn Temple Meads: All Right Me Lads - Lyric: excellent assault on folk music clichés. Music: bloody terrible, ruins the whole effect. This extremely amusing text deserves much better music than this. 4/10.
Intermission: as an aside, I notice that there are many short tracks this time around as opposed to a few longer works. This means few tracks are ever long and tedious (apart from our contribution) but some do sound like disposable filler material. From here on I listen to the tracks in a slightly different order from how they appear on the disc.
Elwyn Temple Meads: Isle Of St Claire - Lyric: excellent assault on folk music clichés. Music: bloody terrible, ruins the whole effect. An extra point because these words are even better! The music, like its companion All Right Me Lads, is simply too normal, too restrained, to do adequate justice to these wonderful words. 5/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Never Killed Anyone / This Way Down - Ah well you see I cheated – after I played this, I listened to it again but this time with both tracks re-mastered as mono tracks in both channels. This Way Down is one of the worst things I’ve ever heard; it’s dreadful. 0/10. Never Killed Anyone is superb and probably the best thing on here. 9/10. As a ‘single’ number, it doesn’t work when combined – one interferes with the other and spoils the effect. 3/10.
DimM D3ciPLe: Saw You Again - Dreadful folk suddenly gives way to electronica – I absolutely loathe this but it has to be said this is well put together and finely crafted, very professional in performance and arrangement – pity I can’t stand it! 1/10.
The Style Pigs: Mr Hatchet Dead Man - Much too punk rock for me to enjoy, not my cup of tea at all and I detest vocals when they’re put through that megaphone effect. So there. It’s even more annoying when this lot write lyrics that are generally interesting, too. 4/10.
Vance Palmier & Evil Jack McDeath: Hijo De Puta - Again, it’s too short – just when I start to enjoy it, it fades out. You tight fisted buggers! Come back here an’ play dat banjo, boy. 6/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Three Chrome Hooks - More marvellous lyrics – one thing that Volume 6 has in spades is a far higher quality of texts this time around which make the brief instrumental contributions even more worthwhile. Anyway, this is another winner although the bass is far too quiet. 7/10.
The Style Pigs: Hog II - Too much punk rockery for me here, far too much in fact. Oh, see? They heard me – it’s gone all 1980s synthi-funk – which is even worse! 1/10.
UNIT: Eco Warrior Blues - Now, compare the actual sound of this to most of the other tracks on here . . . and I had the nerve to accuse Jaw-D of sounding like they’d recorded their piece inside a biscuit tin. Well, what’s this, then, Tupperware? Also, here are six and a half minutes why I should not be encouraged to play saxophone on any of our recordings. Technically this is probably the worst contribution we have ever submitted for godspunk, at least since Volume 1, and apart from some of the keyboard playing by Luc, most of this sounds spastic, amateur and woefully inept. It’s painfully obvious here that I can’t sing for peanuts either. Worthy lyrics, yes, but those poor departed extinct species deserve a better send off than this clumsy sonic mess. 3/10.
Evil Jack McDeath: Miercoles - You see? A big professional sound with people who actually sound like they can play their instruments and enjoy doing so. Oh, that’s it, finished – another one that’s at least a minute shorter than it should be. 7/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: Nation Of Two - A curious deliberate use of atonality which sets off the plaintive text nicely – although this whimsy soon descends into brutality before too long, naturally! One of those almost unbearably intimate songs that make Howl in the Typewriter one of the more unpredictable outfits to parade their wares on godspunk. 8/10.
The Haddenham One: timorous - You know what I said about the pleasant absence of long tedious tracks apart our own messy affair? Well, I spoke too soon. Unlike our track, however, this doesn’t sound like it was cobbled together in a biscuit tin by a bunch of amateurs. This reminds me of early period Nocturnal Emissions although I’m not sure why. 5/10.
Jaw-D: Story Time - Remember those late 1980s computer games? Failing that, think of the Sega or some of the music used on early Playstation 1 games – that’s what this is – after it’s been filtered through life experienced in the 1990s. I absolutely hate this; it actually hurts my ears! But at least it has personality and character. 2/10.
the taurus board: Angel One - Luc is actually up and dancing! Oh sod it, that’s it, I’m joining in. Why should these teenagers have all the fun? Yo, gonna bust me some moves here! Right, let’s play this bugger all over again – yes, another winner from this dynamic duo. Their Bus Stop things on the previous collection were a little disappointing but with this cracker they’re back on track. It could do with a bass guitar or bass sample of some kind, though, says Luc – and as usual he’s right. But it still deserves 8/10."
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, Feb 2oo8)

Why Aren’t You Listening? – The Godspunk compilations
"Not so long ago I gave godspunk volume six a deservedly positive review in this Organ. And lo! There soon came through the post volumes 1-5, each bearing the distinctive (nay, trademark?) cover artwork; that of a slightly out of focus clown face, and each boasting titles that just scream out for recognition. I can’t resist sharing the title of this track that nestles on Volume 5 with you:
Thank You For Being Insane Pervert Human Being – Try Getting A Hearing Aid On The N.H.S., Shithead (Sorry If This Is Printed Upside Down)
That’s by Satan The Jesus Infek’d Needles And Blood. And it sounds like five minutes of screaming bloody madness.
There’s only one thing to do when faced with this sort of challenge, (or that sort of song title) and that’s listen to the entire 5 volume set; which I did. I can say I enjoyed it thoroughly. This is music with a grand, profound agenda; even if, (as with Howl in the Typewriter or Norman) it sets out to take the piss at times.
The music mostly consists of cut ups: lo-fi, sometimes wildly sloppy punk, bedroom rave and ‘dark’ techno; or fabulous bitter singer-songwriter rants. Howl in The Typewriter (with his scuzzy acidic agit-pop) is an ever-present, as is the fuzzy righteousness of UNIT. Acts to look out for are the brilliant Litterbug on volumes 3 and 4; their thrashy tales of suburban underachievement, (Who am I? and Looking Back Then) are fucking out there and should be dance-floor staples. Things veer from straight forward song-writing, like Las Vegas Mermaids’ tremendous Bus Driver (which graces volume 5), to obtuse ideas; a great run of found sounds and acoustic balladry from pinkeye can be found on volume 2.
There’s far too much to describe, really. But it’ll keep you off the streets for hours.
To be honest this is a series that really deserves a place in your collection. Just like those beaten-up small town classics that make up the Pebbles and Rubble compilations, these LPs offer a flip side view to what’s going on. It is also highly intelligent, contrarian, raucous music and genuinely looking out for a chance to expand your mind. It’s all way too honest with itself to play any pop-star games, this in a sense is true punk; no star trips, no entertainment schmaltz, just perverse, searching musical enquiries. Great sleeve notes for each volume, too."
- Richard Foster, Incendiary

godspunk volume five

A compilation CD featuring twenty-five tracks from fourteen bands / artistes: Howl in the Typewriter, the taurus board, UNIT, The Haddenham One, Jaw-D, Bartles, John Tree, Needle Park, Big Ron Turner, Mrs Edna Watley, Evil Jack McDeath, The Charles Napiers, Satan The Jesus Infekt'd Needles And Blood and Las Vegas Mermaids.

"At the fifth attempt Pumf finally manage to put together a godspunk comp that is not only eminently listenable but worth returning to not just once but several times over your lifetime.
I'd almost given up on Pumf supremo Stan Batcow to deliver a more than cursory listen godspunk but with number five he's not only given me something to treasure, it also contains three UNIT tracks that I didn't hate and and and get this kids A POWER ELECTRONICS track. Yessirreebob surenuffandyeshedoes knock me over with a feva lawks a mussey etc etc etc there it is track nine Wound. Whether that's the artist or title track I dunno but the refrain of 'fucked if you do fucked if you don't' over prime Con-Dom like ear batter had me all weak at the knees and ready to dash out and buy Stan a drink and then I remembered, he doesn't drink. But then I search on the incredibly well put together booklet that makes up the cover and there's no contact info for Wound so I begin to wonder if this is some kind of wind up but what the fuck it's a good track let it be for what it is.
So, godspunk five. Some of the names may be familiar. UNIT for one. But here they ditch that lame punk crap for some mighty parping. It suits them better. The 25 tracks kick off in fine style though with some Carter USM like pop brightness from Howl In The Typewriter. Three minute perfect pop don't you know. The man is massively underrated. There seems to be some Hobs involvement in the shape of The Haddenham One who sneaks in a few lines of Milovan's Raven [I'm gonna fuck you up the ass tonite!] in Rave 'Un and some Hobs lines from Amateur Cops in Amateur Dub then again in Satan Jesus and the Infekt'd Needles and Blood who play destroy everything Hijo like on the ridiculously named Thank You For Being Insane Pervert Human Being - Try A Hearing Aid On The NHS Shithead [Sorry If This Is Printed Upside Down]. Needle Park sound like an instrumental shoegazing band, which may not be a bad thing seeing as there seems to be some kind of revival in such matters if my reading of the runes is correct. There are but a few low-lights this being mainly some kind of techno babble from the taurus board whose version of Bus Driver [I'm Going Home] sounds like the crap that emanates from the open windows of badly customized Peugeot 106's driven by young men wearing baseball caps. There's a 40 second track that sounds like a warm up to a whirling dervish session from Big Ron Turner that seems to be chucked in for the fun of it. Enough of these trifles though for track 8 sees The Las Vegas Mermaids encapsulate everything that is bad about getting on a bus in this country with a syncopated bopping bass version of Bus Driver that is quite possibly one of my favourite tracks of the year. After hearing the bus set off and a quick tinkling of the bus bell female Vegas vox Fay Greenhaigh tears into her bus driver with a resigned familiarity; 'No I don't have change I have a note though it is legal tender' before looking out of the window and realizing she's lost and being kidnapped [I only wanted to go on an 18-30 holiday - where is the station?]. Sheer pop perfection that deserves to get The Las Vegas Mermaids on Top of the Pops or failing that Richardand Judy.
There's probably some folks I've missed out here but that's all the more reason for you to get your hand in your pocket and buy it.
For once I'm looking forward to the next godspunk installment."
- Mark Wharton, Idwal Fisher, 2007

"godspunk is a series of compilation CDs my friend & longtime Hob Stan Batcow's Pumf label puts out. Released by pooling money from the contributors, its an easy & relatively cheap way to make available stuff you've done to lots of people who just might like it, on shiny little discs & with the luxury of a nice package. Natty.
Erm . . . I should also mention that I'm on it. Ah well, why not. Its certainly not a Philfest, with a mere six minutes of my addled ideas being wrestled into shape by said Batcow at his homestead studio (on this occasion in the form of some Hobs remixes). This is more like an excuse to talk a bit about the other people on it. Last Sunday afternoon was spent reviewing it alongside some of the other contributors, as we snapped jewel cases together, inserted booklets & got ready to receive our allotted copies. I'm listening again now & feeling it settle nicely, like all the other ones before it.
As usual, Stan provides material himself. His long-running Howl In the Typewriter project offers both brief musical conceits & longer, considered pop of a beguiling nature. Howl completists have a rich history to work on, as he revisits the feel of warped tunesmiths from the Beatles to my bloody valentine. Bartles is one of the sporadic foreign joes slipped in amongst the Sandgrown'uns & other UK postal addressees. A songsmith of the curious kind Stan loves to encourage & promote. Another long history of quirkiness & myth pops its head above the parapet. Elsewhere, top man John reappears in yet another incarnation (John Tree), this time to lay down upon us some jive-talkin' sambafied wiggle-gear. His output is illustrious but sadly still relatively small. The Las Vegas Mermaids get better & better with their crafted nu-age music hall tuneage & Heffey's taurus board is a game of two halves, with the second of the two contributions providing the smile-inducing acidic trance follow-on from the bubbling ambience of the first.
The mystery track is just entitled Wound, & apparently came unaccompanied by information or address, only money. Stan relayed this story with a slightly proud air (is a Batcow hand at play here? Or Simon Hob?). It certainly doesn't sound Stan-stylee. A full-on power electronics track, it kinda falls somewhere between Whitehouse & something Dave Walklett might do. I'm not sure if PE experts will be tracking down the comp for this one, but they should be. As edgy to listen to as PE should be, it is in some ways my favourite track on the CD. Sounds a bit odd amongst the rest, but then we were talking about how this volume is a return to the experimentalism featured right back on volume one (with Hebetation & Stream Angel). It is an interesting aspect of the series. Instead of being a state of the union address from Stan, its a procession of the thoughts recently found bouncing around the heads of his contacts. A veritable Affleck's Palace of sound! It is disparate, but there's some sort of connection created by the very fact that everyone has chosen to come together in the same place.
Moving on, there are, as usual, some tracks from London's UNIT. They are an intriguing group, which you should really check out if you haven't already. I'll leave out their very individual biog & just say that the make-up of the group always seems to inform their truly adventurous music. Sounding different every time, here they have an experimental jazz angle to add to the Gaelic-Chinese rock guitar sound & odd timings of previous efforts. Referencing Denmark Street and Buddhism, they are as different as ever & hence sit very well on this strangest of series. Wouldn't be a bad Termite Club booking as stands here...And then there's the return of Satan the Jesus, Simon Hobs' late eighties project. I was too late to see these live, but they always sound excitingly mangled on tape. This is a new Satan the Jesus piece, a cut-up of previous efforts that takes on the effect of a noise collage. It wasn't my favourite on the CD, but maybe should constitute the beginning of a somehow appropriate updated incarnation of the band, the start of a revival even. More mangled even than the originals, it gives Simon the chance to flex his text-scrambling muscles. What it all means . . . I'm at a loss, old bean. Jaw-D & Needle Park are amongst the most conventionally tuneful cards on the table. Jaw-D has appeared in the series before under another name & is an ex-Blackpool Stan-pal. Needle Park is the brainchild of Hobs stalwart drummer, Ging. Melodic but still quirky, Pumfers to the core, lovers of pre-Britpop guitarness who have developed in a different direction to the posterboys & fashionistas. Finally, there are a number of tracks under various names including Mrs Edna Whatley, which I haven't truly got my head round yet but which all come from the same source. John Fahey pops into my head once or twice, but doesn't really sum it up. Blues fed through a teastrainer & an old tape-deck.
All in all, then, another godspunk that in some way, you do kinda need to hear. Much more entertaining to me than some dull genre-specific effort. Stancore in effect once again! The only missing link is LDB, the highly entertaining highlight of volumes one to three, a rapper in some ways able to stand his ground amongst the great, so good are his lyrics. LDB, we miss you. It should also be mentioned that RooHmania of the Hobs sticks his head in more than once, operating the desk. Kinda hitting the point of being in-house Pumf producer number two, the lad RooH has got it! He is also one of those people with little out & available but hundreds of things on the computer waiting to be unleashed. Get on it, RooH."
- Phil Smith

"This is just about the best godspunk yet.
1 hour later: this is definitely the best godspunk yet. If only LDB was on here, too (sigh).
Wound - Whitehouse . . . Lustmord . . . Nocturnal Emissions . . . Konstruktivists . . . The Grey Wolves . . . but mainly Whitehouse . . . I didn’t realise people still made rackets like this . . . it’s still disturbing and powerful though in 2007 it does seem a bit, you know, let’s make a horrible noise and shock Auntie Mavis when she comes round for cucumber sandwiches. Still, all power to them for doing it regardless. 8/10
John Tree: Night Of The Samba Drummer - Despite the not inconsiderable technical ability on display here, I find this really tedious and boring which probably shows what a philistine I’ve become these days. 20 years ago I’d have loved this I’m sure. 4/10
Las Vegas Mermaids: Bus Driver - The music’s absolutely horrible and boring but the words are most amusing and certainly accurately describe 95% of bus drivers in Edinburgh where they are trained to be as rude, abusive and incessantly miserable as possible at all times. 5/10
Jaw-D: Skateboard Park - This hurts my ears and that’s all there is to it. 0/10
Bartles: Iran & Iraq - By Christ, this bunch kick serious ass (so to speak). Very clever puns on place names . . .but what’s going on? There’s a band who are more political sounding than UNIT on a godspunk album – shock horror! What a voice, too. I wish I could growl like that. 9/10
Bartles: Pumpkin Dump - My God this is so creepy it’s frightening. Those deliberately out of sync voices + distant loud guitars are strictly from RIO 2 only better! Now this is what punk bands should sound like . . . innovative, powerful, interesting and shit-kicking with intelligence. 9/10
The Haddenham One: Rave 'Un - Yawn . . . sorry but this is just The Residents only worse. 2/10
The Haddenham One: Amateur Dub - . . . and so is this. The bass playing is good, though. 3/10
Evil Jack McDeath: Harmonium In My Head - Toothache . . . laying in a sweat stained bed with influenza and a migraine . . . ugh! Effective though grim. 4/10
The Charles Napiers: Things've Changed Round Here - Ennio Morricone on LSD only better . . .6/10
Satan The Jesus Infekt'd Needles And Blood: Insane Pervert Human Being - Jesus Christ, where do you find these people? Otomo Yoshihide when he was 15. This is almost as painful as Star Gate by UNIT. 3/10. Second listen: no, I was wrong . . . this is actually more like Faust without their hippy crap influences. It’s much better 2nd time round. 8/10
Big Ron Turner: Oh Kerim Bey - Acoustic guitar valium rock. Ugh! 2/10
Mrs Edna Watley: The Fifth Letter - More drones . . . okay, I know it’s short but . . . ugh! 2/10
Needle Park: She Comes In The Storm - This is what happens when a 21st century band has never heard any music from 1967 (nothing before 1976 in fact) but they have it described to them in words and they then try to recreate what they think it sounded like. Well, 1960s crap was never as good as this! 9/10
Howl in the Typewriter: The Last Crumb - Such restraint is unusual for HITT – you lot really should write more out and out pop songs, you’re so good at it. The words are interesting, quite powerful in fact – music duzny move me much at all although when the bass comes in at about 1’50 the whole thing lifts and changes it from a mere 5/10 to a creditable 7/10.
Howl in the Typewriter: I Seen Man - I bet you all had real fun putting this together . . . sounds like you all chose your own Radio 2 music and played multiple layer samples to see what it would sound like . . . occasionally it’s effective. 6/10
Howl in the Typewriter: Preliminary Mash Up - No and I don’t like it either. 1/10
Howl in the Typewriter: Penultimate Mash Up - Silence would indeed be preferable to this. 1/10
Howl in the Typewriter: Concluding Mash Up - Bob The Builder is not the way to win friends and influence people, Stan . . .really, it isn’t. 1/10
Howl in the Typewriter: Bus Driver - Well, again, parts of this are really gear . . . while others just irritate me . . . but taken en masse, for the intricate arrangement and the constant changes of mood and tempo (plus occasional downright nastiness), it deserves at least 7/10.
the taurus board: Bus Driver On The Road - Not one of their best . . . too much poncy rhythms and not enough interesting stuff happening . . . it barely makes the grade. 5/10
the taurus board: Bus Driver I’m Going Home - This is more like . . . early evening in Ibiza, one of the warm up tracks to start people moving and bust some moves on the floor.
UNIT: Ivor Kallin Goes To Denmark Street - Hardly a classic but it’s good to hear U-J (on drums) try to keep in time with Luc (also on drums) while Trung (on bass, right) is clearly out-classed and a little over-awed by Dave (on bass, left). Achoi gives it large on his little keyboard and the vibraphone that has now become the most defining sound by which UNIT are identified. Ivor Kallin (correct spelling) presents Ambrosia Rasputin on Resonance.
UNIT: The Buddhist Response To Western Aggression - Eastern civilised boy teaches western barbarian how to behave . . . so stereotypical it’s almost condescending but it still works, just, although it would be better had I been able to play a little more in tune! 7/10
UNIT: No Matter, Try Again, Fail Again, Fail Better - U-J on flute (through wah-wah, octaver and flanger) and drums and Trung (on sax and one of the 2 bass guitars) are the stars of this piece although Luc (drums and piano strings) and Achoi (relentless piano) are not far behind. Dave is rather restrained on his bass guitar but this isn’t really his kind of music. All the same, this is quite simply one of the best pieces of improvised music UNIT has ever done. 9/10
It’s a pity U-J didn’t include the list of who plays what – this is the first time UNIT tracks have been included on which I don’t appear at all! Oh, no, apart from my abysmal sax blowing on Buddhist Response . . . but it has a reason for being there as you can understand.
All in all, this is probably the most consistently avant garde and inaccessible godspunk yet which is probably why it is also the most original, inventive, innovative and interesting. Even UNIT sound (almost) as adventurous as some of the other acts on here. Bartles are the major discovery here, of course although the rag-head contributions (tracks 2, 7, 15, 16, 19, 21) do much to make this one of the most intriguing compilations anyone has put out for years."
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, May 2oo7)

godspunk volume four

A compilation CD featuring twenty-one tracks from ten bands / artistes: Howl in the Typewriter, the taurus board, UNIT, Litterbug, Pilzin Sox, Yximalloo, RooHmania, Stream Angel, The Haddenham One and Lenin's Virulent Muscle. .

"A collection of 21 tracks from a variety of sources, combining electronica, experimental and some poetry and talking. Samples abound on a number of the tracks and the vast majority have strong bass and rhythm. A few are discordant and quite disturbing and, to me anyway, grate after a while. There are several quite dreamy tracks, and Alice Floats Away by Pilzin Sox stands out of the crowd. In a Nutshell combines the simple sweet tinkles of ‘The Hills are Alive with the sound of music’ with samples and industrial clanging. Litterbug has a couple of great tracks, reminding me of the alternative noises that came out of the early 80s. Nine and a half minutes has a fantastic guitar hook and strong bass, combined with ecstatic moanings and breathing throughout and yes it does last 9.5 minutes and does come to a conclusion! A finer collection of group names you’ll not find – how about Lenin’s Virulent Muscle or Howl in the Typewriter. For sheer variety from one track to the next, UNIT can’t be matched – spoken words, vocal juggling, ethereal sounds and ear-ripping noises over 5 tracks. As usual I could go on and on here when I’m writing about godspunk stuff, but naturally everyone is going to have their own favourite style and sound. Again just excellent".
- Liam, Modern Dance

godspunk volume three

A compilation CD featuring twenty-one tracks from twelve bands / artistes: Howl in the Typewriter, LDB, Litterbug, the taurus board, Pissed Off, Norman, Razor Dog, The Time Flies!, The Reverends, The 3 Ages of Elvis, Kate Fear & Nigel Joseph and UNIT.

"(Note: Dave has already listened to the CD but was not that interested in much of the contributors. I've relayed his comments, however. I have already listened to the disc through once but since I'm sat here with Achoi, who also wants to give his review, I have the benefit of a second listen before I allow my opinionated, biased comments to insult 75% of the bands and artists involved).
Howl In The Typewriter: Affairs Of The Heart - Gangsta rap now is it - oho - howling typewriters check out the LDB flAava - bossman Burton definitely up in yo 'hood. Enough: to date, this is beyond doubt 1) the most interesting lyric you have ever written (that I have heard), 2) the most proficiently performed work you have ever recorded (that I have heard) and 3) easily my favourite Howl In The Typewriter / Ceramic Hobs track of all. Even the brief punk excerpts are forgivable . . . but I find it extremely difficult to believe this is not either a deliberate homage to Lawrence or an intentional pastiche of his style. It surely cannot be a coincidence. 10/10 (Achoi somehow contrives to award this masterpiece a mere 8/10. Bah - youngsters, what do they know?)
The 3 Ages Of Elvis: Buttercup - No, no, no . . . this sounds like late 70s / early 80s pop punk - it's horrible. 1/10
The 3 Ages Of Elvis: Dishwash - Oh God, save me from hearing any more punk rock of any kind ever! Yes, I know they can play well and all that but this is just horrible. It's even more out of place on godspunk than our stuff. It's so conservative . . . well, too much for me. Nice band name though. 1/10 (Dave says these tracks are a gas but he's probably biased because he loves the band name! Achoi awards both these 0/10).
Pissed Off: Asylum - What the devil is this supposed to represent? Poor Eve Libertine now set to a bad dance track? This was one of the very few good tracks the otherwise odious / boring / tedious Crass ever released - so this bunch decide to ruin it. I see what they've tried to do and it's a brave attempt but the power of the lyric is obliterated. 3/10 (Achoi gives this 9/10 . . . but then he's never heard the Crass version which is perhaps an advantage in order to appreciate this. Dave, who used to like Crass, largely agrees with my sentiments).
Norman: Paranoia - Resonance FM would love this. Pity, really, because I can't stand it. I ought to like it, really . . . it's not so far removed from some UNIT material . . . the middle section is more intriguing, of course, until he goes punque roque and then I switch off entirely. It's also far too bloody long for my no doubt Simpsons addled attention span. 2/10 (Note: please tell Norman that Mr Dave Fanning reckons this is the best track on the whole CD! Achoi says it has possibilities and awards it 5/10 but he says if the punk section was removed it'd rise to 7/10!)
Litterbug: Who Am I? - Why do I like this band? The guitar sound is wretched, the vocals are horrible . . . yet there's something . . . something I can't quite define . . . bits of punk, Joy Division, Oasis and The Swell Maps all rolled into one decidedly curious mix. It doesn't quite match the excellence of their godspunk 1 tracks but it still makes the grade. 6/10
Litterbug: Looking Back Then - Well, after the above, this is not so good . . . musically, at least . . . but as with the previous number, the lyrics are actually very odd - without being abstract or pretentious. I like these lyrics; bizarre holiday and television references that I don't understand, probably because I don't have a TV. I'd still prefer a clearer production and the vocals to have been sung in a more definite pitch. 6/10 (Achoi gives these pieces 2/10 - I don't know what drugs he's on but they're doing him no good at all).
the taurus board: Green & Neon - Each time you release a godspunk CD, Achoi and I await the next instalment of the taurus board. This lot prove that all those nights and days spent during the 1990s at raves and in warehouses were not misspent youth after all but merely preparation for this - no, really they reveal there is still plenty of life in the old dance / techno dog yet. This track is a little too chill-out for me. I prefer my dance style more hardcore (drum'n'bass / jungle is my preferred genre). Still, it deserves 8/10. (Dave says he simply cannot comprehend what Achoi and I appreciate in this stuff. Bah - oldsters, what do they know? Achoi gives it 10/10, but then he'd give this lot 10/10 if they came round his house and blew fog horns into his ears at 4 in the morning).
Razor Dog: Gonna Catch Up - The bass playing is solid. That's it. I managed to say something positive about this horrible late 70s noise. 1/10
Razor Dog: This Love's Absurd - Not that hoary old riff yet again . . . this sounds so 1979! It's abysmal even though it's played very well. 1/10 (Note: there is far too much pub-punk rock on this instalment of godspunk. Don't do it again. Achoi (true to form) gives these pieces 0/10. Dave reckons he'd have really liked these tracks had he heard them 20 years ago. Talk about damning with faint praise! He still likes them both, especially the second track).
Howl In The Typewriter: Walter & Frank - Not one of your best, Mr Batcow . . . strange tape of strange northern gents notwithstanding. 5/10 (Achoi likes this one, too - an 8/10 no less. Have you acquired a new fan or is he just a crawler?)
LDB: The Trial - Can this man do no wrong? I have the fortune to have heard all his rap numbers - all of them - the double album Mind Of A Postman is the most criminally neglected gangsta rap classic ever recorded this side of the Atlantic. Being primarily a writer of texts I can appreciate how he hammers his couplets into shape and forces rhymes out of virtually nowhere . . . but this one escaped my trawl of his works. Just as it begins to become a little repetitive, the music fades and this courtroom skit reveals why he is not a bad ass black rapper from the Bronx - then we're back into the music as he comes across with pure honesty, no clichés, no pretence, no fake gangsta rap image . . . this is that rare bird: a humorous rap that also contains a serious message to all poseurs everywhere. 9/10 because it's a little murky in sound quality, the only fault I can find in it. (Achoi only gives this 7/10 because he's a punk ass muthafukkin bitch brained ho').
The Reverends: World Of Cricket -Marvellous title . . . interesting structure . . . but the 'production' is like some Apostles crap from 1983, which is a pity because this piece is better than most of what The Apostles ever did - although it needs a more forceful or interesting vocalist. It then fails to develop any of the initially interesting ideas - to my satisfaction at least. It's one of the more adventurous pieces on this CD and would be improved with more work done on it. 6/10
UNIT: Make Believe - I didn't realise just how commercial Garlens' stuff was until I hear it in this new context. We do sound professional and even quite slick here - nice pop song but, I don't know . . . it's still old fashioned somehow. Is that Garlens' fault? Then again, does it matter anyway? I still like this track. 7/10 (Achoi gives this 9/10 but then he likes Garlen and tends to be too generous in his opinions of the lads' musical abilities / limitations. Still, this is one of his more inspired works. Dave and U-J can't listen to anything Garlen wrote - they hate it all with a vengeance!)
UNIT: Intlatol In Tiamacazquime - Ha! How to ensure LDB appears twice on godspunk 3. No, I can see why U-J remixed this as a purely instrumental track with the bass and guitars louder. In being kind to Lawrence I made the music backing indistinct and murky so it loses 80% of its power and majesty. As a result, this now sounds as if Lawrence is reciting this tract in a big empty hall while some band is playing in the next room. 5/10
UNIT: In A Chinese Youth Club - Poor Garlen - tries hard to sing a vocal designed for me originally. Still, with the third person tense, the text has more intense power somehow, less self pity than the version on which I sing. Musically this is the most adventurous of the quartet we sent you and it shows. 8/10
UNIT: Breaking Barriers - Well, despite my weak singing, this remains my own favourite despite being over 10 years old (mainly). The winning combination of U-J on two flutes, Achoi on vibraphone (and drums, obviously) and stealing the bass and guitar riff from Incandescence for the middle section (as I'm sure you noticed - such conservationists, we always recycle riffs and melodies) has definitely breathed new life into this old standard. Pity about my voice, though. 9/10
Kate Fear & Nigel Joseph: Little Bird - A bit of a mess, this, but an interesting mess nonetheless with some intriguing texts. Unfortunately, once it starts, it stays in that groove and goes nowhere - the vocals have been recorded with way too much bass and no treble so after 30 seconds the whole thing becomes little more than a drone. Like The Reverends, this track has possibilities and potential that aren't realised. 4/10
The Time Flies: Mr Jeffrey Martin Lichtmann - The pun in the band name is cool . . . the music less so, although the keyboard bass groove is nice. The trouble with this stuff is it's too well mannered, too polite - techno should be in your face and kick ass - this is too ambient for my taste although it's still a damn sight better than many of the tracks on this CD but then I would say that, wouldn't I? Mr Hippodrome Ibiza here with his friggin' Chemical Brothers and Andy C collection! 7/10 (Achoi also gives this 7/10 although unlike me, he's only heard all these tracks once so far, whereas I'm hearing them the second time around (and it was a bloody pain enduring Elvis and Razor Dog again I can tell you).
The Time Flies: Spiritual Fornication - Now we diverge - this track reminds me of Out Of Afrika by the Chemical Brothers but without the kicking hardcore references which make that track so good. Again, this has potential - with a different mix and some extra samples, this could be a dance-floor killa. That's it, I've just cracked it: both these tracks sound unfinished. Still, on the strength of these two tracks, I really hope they are included in godspunk 4. 7/10 (Achoi gives this 9/10 although I can't see why this is so much better than Mr JML).
Howl In The Typewriter: Personal Ads - A howl . . . followed by a minute of silence . . . followed by a rant that, if read in a Scottish accent, could so easily be The Apostles circa 1989 a couple of weeks prior to my departure when I loathed and despised everything and everyone, including myself. What a way to end a CD! For that reason alone - 10/10! (Even Achoi gives it 9/10, mainly because he finds it really amusing - as if you're telling everyone to 'fuck off' after they've had the decency to purchase and listen to the CD! I know your ire is directed at those grim personal advertisements such as one finds in Private Eye but I prefer to imagine you're directing your comments at your record buying public.
In conclusion, I have to say this is the godspunk edition I enjoy least, primarily because there is a surfeit of pub punk gear, early 80s sounding cassette pet type tracks, not enough avant garderie and only 1 LDB track. Achoi says the Howl In The Typewriter contributions were far more adventurous and interesting on volume 2 although we both agree that Affairs Of The Heart is an absolute classic. He asked me to play it again and he's revised his initial score to 9/10 - he says the brief punk interludes spoil it or it'd be 10/10. Fair enough."
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, August 2oo5)

godspunk volume two

A compilation CD featuring thirty-four (or possibly twenty-seven) tracks from ten bands / artistes: Howl in the Typewriter, LDB, the taurus board, UNIT, pinkeye, Higgins++, Pissed Off, RooHmania, Gays in the Military and Las Vegas Mermaids.

"That old post-punk 'cassette culture' is still going strong, you just have to look for it . . . godspunk vol. 1 was one of my favourites of last year, so I was well chuffed to be sent the latest instalment by the man like LDB. It's a bit of a gargantuan effort this time round, with a whopping 34* tracks by 10 bands.
(*0r perhaps, 27 tracks - confusing? Yes!).
Label owners Howl in the Typewriter inhabit low-tech techno & post-punk territory with a nod to Wire, 70s Eno, and a whole truckload of other influences- It's definitely post-punk in 'never went away' modus operandi way, rather than a revival cash-in. (Although hopefully they will do alright now that the stars are correctly aligned again for this sort of stuff!) Some good poppy tunes + cynical lyrics = HIT! 'I'm not going to see the mormons again  / I don't think the mormons are my friends.' Innit. [It's llamas, not mormons! Ed].
Some more standout tracks from LDB: hip hop stylings which work precisely because he is too white, too old and too grumpy. This set builds on the innovation with the beats etc we saw glimpses of last time - samples of Candi Stanton's You Got The Love, the Pixies, etc. It's incredible that he does all of this without the aid of a sequencer. Basically I reckon this is just as good as The Streets (but in another direction to them/him), but I am biased. Stadium R 'n' B is the HIT! here. Last Days of Rome is the head-nodder for walking those mean streets. Warrior, is the, uh, stooped rawk number. (I really hope this is a one off!)
'Have you ever been porked? Ever had a man smoke your pole?' Gays In The Military contribute serious homo-swamp-rock topped & tailed with some great campsploitation film samples. Lyrically it's a voyage into the underworld of yesteryear (?) 'the yellow hankie boys/ they don't like to kiss / they just want to get down on their knees and drink your piss!" HIT!
Las Vegas Mermaids don't seem to live in Las Vegas, but I reckon they really are mermaids. Their first track here is a tender, yet upbeat number - a touching daughter's tribute to her father 'you're just a rich old man with his ball bag hanging out / please put it away / I'm going to join a commune in France / and get fisted on stage every night' HIT! Track two is Weevils - deeply twisted sub trip hop 'weevils - insects of the night'. Errrrrrr?!
RooHmania's remix of Howl in the Typewriter (one of their catchiest tracks from volume 1) is a bootleg mashup charting the history of UK pop. It covers Strawberry Fields, Satisfaction, Pretty Vacant, Blue Monday - all killer no filler! Their other track here is a rather fine skittery folk number, like a punkier Beta Band.
UNIT storm in at the last minute to deliver four tracks which average about 2 minutes each. As you would expect they cover quite a lot of ground in that time - a humanist version of All Things Bright and Beautiful and a couple of anti-bigotry rants (one of which is the latest instalment in a long line of autobiographical incidents). Two Weeks in Malaysia is another classic UNIT pop ditty, tailor made for Andy Martin's delivery; 'I know this song isn't very deep / and maybe it'll send you fast asleep / but it's better than pills / or counting sheep' - HIT!
Other tracks veer from experimental field recordings to politicised EBM.
I think it's safe to say that you won't find godspunk vol.2 in the shops, but you can order it for just five quid (inclusive of UK p&p) via the Pumf Records website - while you're there check out their other releases."
John Eden, Uncarved, 2004

"Gays In The Military: The Aids Team - You fuckin' what, John? Atonal faggot road rock - this I do not like. The lyrics do not sense make and the music, while unusual and nicely recorded (especially the bass guitar) is not really my cup of tea .. . all this handkerchief stuff and nonsense . . . my God, this is why I have being queer! Bizarre structure - horrible vocals. (4/10)
Las Vegas Mermaids: Rich Man's Ball Bag - Now this is more like it (vocals) although the music is a bit of a dirge, isn't it? Excellent lyrics, though. Pity the music is so grim. Superb ending! (7/10)
Las Vegas Mermaids: Weevils - The music here is much better - techno with style and more marvellous vocals. The keyboard sounds are much more interesting and effective here. Disturbing lyrics to create a most effective atmosphere. Real techno done properly! (9/10)
Pissed Off: Rivers Of Baby Lon - My God, this is excellent too! Where do you find all this stuff? Sampled machine guns in time with the drum machine, too. Industrial techno - superb tape montage. It's perhaps a little polemical but it's none the worse for that . . . a little too long but. (8/10)
Higgins++: Silent Weapons For A Quiet War - Polemic? This virtually preaches at me, I mean, lighten up! No, I shouldn't complain because 99% of pop music these days says nothing and supports the corporate mind numbing machine . . . but (groan) this goes on and on until it irritates me but then I know all this . . . I'd like to play this to the HCYC lads though. (5/10)
Higgins++: A New England - By the way, their page in the booklet is brilliant! Techno punk rock? Sounds like a track from Bullshit Detector that failed to make the grade, no doubt because there's no swearing, you can hear the words and it's quite tuneful. I still don't like it, even though I sympathise with his sentiments and stance. (4/10)
RooHmania: Shulavon7 - What's he/they done to your song, Stan? I prefer your version although this is quite interesting - punk rock segues into techno segues into New Order: very clever! Howl in the Blue Monday already. Yes, this is very smart indeed. (8/10)
RooHmania: J.I.G. - Fairport Connection and Steeleye Span played by New Order circa 1991. This lot are beyond doubt the most technically accomplished artists on the CD by far. It's nice to hear a purely instrumental work, too. (9/10)
Howl in the Typewriter: Llamas - I remember this from that CD-R you sent to me. Pity the production is a little, er, bass and middle biased. Nice tune, strange words - actually, 'nice tune, strange words' applies to many of your pieces. (6/10)
Howl in the Typewriter: Here Comes The Butterfly - You must now be called a MOST ANNOYING CUNT for writing the best thing I've heard you create with the best lyrics I've ever heard you sing . . . and then split / shred it to pieces, shortened shards of 10 second fragments oh BLOODY HELL buggering bollocks, why did you have to do this? The concept is fine, innovative, but not on this number, Stan, not on what is beyond doubt the best thing you've ever written! Of course, that's a silly statement - only you know what is the best thing you've ever written, but . . . all the same. If you release godspunk volume three, can you put the unabridged version on it so we can all enjoy and savour it? The lyrics are simply superb - brilliant - excellent. What more can I say? (10/10)
Howl in the Typewriter: Jesus, Buddha and Allah - As for this - it's a bloody racket! (1/10)
Pinkeye: The One - . . . er . . . well . . . (2/10)
Pinkeye: Outside - . . . (sigh) . . . frankly . . . maybe I'm more conservative than I'd like to admit but . . . (0/10)
Pinkeye: The Swan - . . . what's the matter with Capital Letters anyway? This is the best one yet . . . (7/10)
Pinkeye: Lucy Bird - . . . mutated folk meets Syd Barret lyrics in hell . . . (1/10)
Pinkeye: Field1 - . . . and talking of hell . . . (1/10)
Pinkeye: Field2 - . . . despite being mercifully short . . . (1/10)
the taurus board: King Of Denial - More lower case weirdness - no, this lot deserve to be reprised from volume one. I'm glad to see they made it here along with us, you and LDB. Repetitive, yes, but still there's that renegade non-commercial techno sound that would do well in he clubs. My problem is: it's too long. Of course, it's not designed for one man alone in a bedroom in a chair. It's a dance groove for a club but with a subversive tape insert in the middle. This lot fascinate me. Thinking man's techno! (7/10)
LDB: Last Days Of Rome - Gangsta rap in a midlands accent - I'm convinced even if I didn't know LDB I'd still think his stuff was superb. What anger, vitriol and invective + intelligence in a 5½ minute slice of bitter fulmination against everything I detest in UK post modernism. There's more aggression in this than all that 1980's anarcho punk combined. This kicks serious ass! My bloody hell, this stuff really is as hard as hell! (9/10)
LDB: Stadium R&B - Musically this is more advanced than a dozen Three Six Mafia clones. Why does this work so well? LDB has taken his experience of industrial music and pop groups, married that to American hip-hop and gangsta rap; result: ART, mate, pure art. No bullshit, no fuss, no mess just pure impact. Excellent singalong chorus, too! (9/10)
LDB: Warrior - This should be done by Manowar or Celtic Frost - but not LDB! A rare example of one of his tirades that doesn't quite make the grade. (3/10)
UNIT: Bright And Beautiful - Bizarre: mutant punk rock. This still sounds as if it was recorded in 1986. (6/10)
UNIT: Made In Hong Kong - Oh dear . . . I mean, it's all very enjoyable but I really don't have the right kind of voice for this kind of stuff and this music sounds so old fashioned now, especially in the context of this CD's contents. (5/10)
UNIT: Out To Lunch - Well, it's amusing but so 1980's! That guitar sounds horrible, too. (6/10)
UNIT: The Letter - At last: a track that sounds as if it should be on this compilation and also sounds as if it was recorded recently! Most disturbing - it brings tears of rage to my eyes even now. (10/10)
UNIT: Two Weeks In Malaysia - I'm glad you decided to include this after all. Actually we should have just sent you The Letter and this wonderful little pop song. (8/10 - rotten guitar sound again!)"
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, May 2oo4)

godspunk volume one

A compilation CD featuring seventeen tracks from seven bands / artistes: Howl in the Typewriter, LDB, Hebetation, Litterbug, the taurus board, Stream Angel and UNIT.

"Seventeen track compilation from Pumf featuring artists such as LDB, Howl in the Typewriter, Stream Angel, UNIT, and Litterbug. Now, Howl in the Typewriter took my breath away earlier this year, so I was eager to hear what else Pumf were prepared to put their name to. LDB, whilst inherently sounding uniquely home made, is, ultimately, honest. A few years ago, several poets began to put their words to music, be it simple beat box or cut ups, or whatever. LDB reminds me of this, where the words become meatier. They're not songs, as such, but poems with musical backing, if you know what I mean. the taurus board's Ripple Effect is simply brilliant, nuff said. Litterbug sound like early demos of The Cure! Not overly keen on UNIT, the reason, I think, is because they're just not experimental enough. In and amongst the likes of Stream Angel, Hebetation, LDB, Howl and taurus, they sound relatively 'normal'! A cracking introduction to Pumf, and to the individual acts on the label. Love to hear more taurus, though, Ripple Effect really stands out."
- Modern Dance, 2004

"A collection of tracks that all defy categorisation and are united by - if anything - an obsession with sounding as original as possible. To say there are 17 tracks spread over 71 generous minutes, there are just 7 artists involved with Howl in the Typewriter's tracks being launched by Jesus! and its crazy dance beat bludgeoning raving good vibes; imagine the Polyphonic Spree on sanity-bending drugs and you'll still be nowhere near . . . [Howl} also contributes Mirrorshades, which is a much briefer, synth-based affair of atmospherics. Most of the tracks are anchored by strong dance beats. LDB and Deathwish come forth as sinister, cooly dark R&B with a distinctly original twist . . . the taurus board are the only outfit to contribute just the one track to this compilation; entitled Ripple Effect, its hip and uppity beat is one of the album's highlights, as is Litterbug's wicked beat-&-guitar fusion on Delmario. Serving as a benchmark for largely unknown underground talent, if only money-hoarders The National Lottery would generously fund more and more small labels and help them release more and more compilations of this inspirational nature . . . woe to supporting so much sport, because music is far more important when it comes to helping to further humanitarian causes, and literally changing people's lives and attitudes. UNIT realise that 'the media sends us all to sleep' through God Of Nothing, following straight on from their God of Grumblers. Just like you should realise that some of the music here is genuinely some of the most original music you will have most likely heard in a very long time indeed. 5/5".
- Steve Rudd, Juxta Online, 2003

"Howl in the Typewriter: Jesus! (9/10) - The 5'40" extended disco remix inna big up The Man anthem . . . it's worth being a God Botherer jus so you can singalongatypewriter to this marvellous piece. I would give it 10/10 if it ended at about 5'00" when the instruments fade out leaving the voices - that was the ideal place to leave it.
Howl in the Typewriter: Mirrorshades (6/10) - The 0'42" edit . . . God nose. I'd give this 7 or 8 out of 10 if it was 2'00" but it's too damn short. A song or instrumental should be like a boy's shorts or girl's dress: brief enough to be interesting and long enough to cover the subject.
Howl in the Typewriter: The Body (8/10) - The Nocturnal Emmissions meets Tubeway Army in Throbbing Gristle's recording studio. This is one of the better works on the CD . . . reminds me of 'Donor', a track we did in 1990 although  you [Howl] use rhythms more effectively. Who said industrial noise can't be commercial? Well done, sir!
Howl in the Typewriter: Love Camp No 7  - (7/10)Well, I'm glad there are four works by HITT because this stuff is superb, really. It is also nice to have a gentle, melodic (but still challenging) contrast to LDB and UNIT. There's something almost Abba about the use of keyboards and that's high praise indeed. The words / voice-over part is not so interesting as Jesus! and The Body.
Hebetation: 10/10/02 (5/10) - If Iannis Xenakis had been a pop musician instead of an avant garde composer . . . Dome meets the Door and the Window . . . I'm glad people still do soundscapes like this but it's still not my kind of music. Note: they have good control of their instruments and effects, especially in a live context . . . this sort of stuff can so easily dissolve into chaos but this is cleverly structured. I wish I liked this . . . but I don't!
the taurus board: Ripple Effect (4/10) - Techno marries funk in the church of TOPY. If this was only 2 minutes long or if it changed key and / or rhythm, it would be pretty gear . . . as it stands, it goes on far too long without doing much else. Pity because it's cool and funky and has potential. LDB should do a mean rap over some of this!
Litterbug: Codeine (6/10) - It's a bit bloody morbid, ain't it, guv? Still, it shows you what can be done with conventional instruments in a non-conventional manner that is still interesting. Not mad on those high vocals but they do suit the words.
Litterbug: Delmario (10/10) - Fuck me sideways, this is brilliant! These people have put together that chunky Joy Division / New Order instrumental that we've tried to do in the past and never managed. Cunts! Seriously, on the strength of these two [songs], I'd like to hear more. It makes a change to hear a band who do instrumentals. (I wish we'd done one, now - I grow sick of the sound of my own reedy, tinny vocals).
Stream Angel: Day That Will (3/10) - . . . and this is only an excerpt? Christ, this is really irritating. Pity because I know this chap and he's always so generous, intelligent and perceptive about our work . . . but I can't cope with this at all. Sorry, Stream!
LDB: Death Wish (10/10) - Now the heavy stuff - and by hell, this is mean motherfucking murderation - I know who this is about but that's irrelevant. What matters is that this proves White Men Can Rap! This kicks arse and knocks So Solid Crew into the middle of last month. I can't fault this.
LDB: Never Go Back Again (9/10) - Yes, I know Puff Daddy can write gentle, powerful, perceptive lyrics but this shows how it really should be done. I've heard this before but I couldn't have paid attention the first time because I thought it was OK then but now - my God this is so nostalgic, sad and yet never morbid. Some of these words are so nice (in the best sense of that maligned word) and generous. Rap doesn't just have to be about violence and revenge.
LDB: Ode To Some People . . . (8/10) - Now we're back in more familiar territory. Note: LDB and UNIT independently choose to attack trendy commercial underground scne types / fanzines. Go with the flow, these words are so powerful that I can ignore the occasionally repetitive music. This is no nonsense, no pretence, no fuss pure honesty that cuts through all the bullshit.
LDB: Faction Paradox (10/10) - Up tempo sci-fi influenced fun complete with that most potent of mixes: anger combined with humour. It usually works and it certainly does here. Note: all these instruments are played, not sampled. This is a rollercoaster of revenge, a delightful frolic that completes the most enjoyable, entertaining and effective quartet of works on the CD.
UNIT: Incandescence (8/10) - Adapted from a Tony Hancock episode that ridicules avant garde art movements, this is an affectionate parody set to simple yet powerful music only slightly spoiled by the rather inept singing. The structure is excellent with the unaccompanied vocal central section framed by heavy rock outer segments. With a decent singer this would be 10/10 easily.
UNIT: God Of Grumblers (8/10) - This starts promising . . . but devolves into a laborious funk rap with the vocals too low in the mix. A bird's voice would sound better on this. The funk chorus is good but 5 minutes of lead guitar and bass guitar twittering becomes very tedious after a while. The drumming is actually very good - which is most unusual for our band! Unusual lyrics which accounts for the higher score.
UNIT: God Of Nothing (2/10) - Jesus Christ, this is bloody awful. The words aren't bad (if a little sloganeering) but it just goes on and on - nowhere. The bass playing is good but it has no real melody to play worth remembering. It deserves 2 for the words (some of them) but that's all.
UNIT: A Head Wound And A Fracture (8/10) - This is more like it: punk rap! It's just a little on the long side but otherwise this is white hot rage with articulate anger matched to occasionally amusing rhymes. The music is a little basic but it matches the subject matter. The revenge against racial abuse and homophobic bigotry does need this quietly simmering rage rather than bawling screams so I'm glad I resisted the temptation to shout the words. In retrospect I wish I hadn't resorted to swearing - it sounds immature. I'm not why it works when LDB does it but when I do it, I do sound a bit like a boy who's older brother has just broken his playstation2 . . .which would be a perfectly justifiable reason for breaking out into military language, of course."
- Andy Martin (in a personal letter to pStan Batcow, March 2oo3)

Pumf Records